Seriously, I'm not even going to pretend.
There's a press release and some promo art after the break. Go read it while I dig out my old Duke action figures-
Legendary video game hero to finally return and kick-ass on consoles and Windows PC in 2011; playable demo at Penny Arcade ExpoFriday 3rd September/... 2K Games and Gearbox Software announced today that forever is nearly here, as Duke Nukem Forever® will officially make its long-awaited debut for the Xbox 360® video game and entertainment system from Microsoft, PlayStation®3 computer entertainment system and Windows PC in calendar 2011. Duke Nukem, the interactive entertainment industry’s most irreverent and quoted character of all time, will bring his signature brand of babe-lovin’, cigar-smoking, beer-chugging and ass-kicking action as he once again saves the Earth and our babes from hordes of invading aliens. In other shocking news, Duke Nukem Forever will be playable right now for all attendees 17 and older of this year’s Penny Arcade Expo at the 2K Booth (booth #3417), giving the first hands-on experience with the game that was originally announced during the tail end of the Clinton Administration.
"All great things take time... a lot of time," laughs Christoph Hartmann, president of 2K. "After a hiatus from the video game world, Duke Nukem is back and better than ever. The return of the King from the glory days of shooters will satisfy our patient, die-hard fans, as well as a new generation of bubble gum-chewing, flat top and shades-wearing bad-asses. Make no mistake about it - Duke Nukem Forever is a testament to the era of when shooters were bodacious and fun."
Put on your sunglasses and prepare to step into the boots of Duke Nukem, whose legend has reached epic proportions in the years since his last adventure. The alien hordes are back and only Duke can save the world, again. Pig cops, alien shrink rays and enormous alien bosses won’t stop our hero from accomplishing his one and only goal: to save the world, save the babes and to be a bad-ass while doing it. The King of All Shooters is back with over-the-top weapons, massive aliens and unprecedented levels of interactivity. This game puts pedal to the metal and tongue firmly in cheek, among other places. Shoot hoops, lift weights, read adult magazines, draw crude messages on whiteboards or ogle one of the many beautiful women that populate Duke’s life; that is if you can pull yourself away long enough from kicking ass and taking names. Duke Nukem was and will forever be immortalized in gaming history, and this is his legend.
“Hail to the king, baby! It's unbelievable, it kicks ass and it's totally going to happen!” said Randy Pitchford, president of Gearbox Software, "Gearbox has enabled die-hard key Duke Nukem franchise builders and skilled veteran game makers to stand together and deliver. All gamers deserve a happy ending and after all of us gamers feeling the full range of emotions about Duke Nukem Forever, I am thrilled to be in a position with the trust, power and means to make it happen. Am I crazy? Balls of steel, baby, balls of steel!”
Duke Nukem Forever is currently in development for Xbox 360, PlayStation 3 system and Windows PC and is not yet rated. 2K Games has the exclusive, long-term publishing rights to the game. To catch your first glimpse of the Duke Nukem Forever experience please visit www.dukenukem.com.